Cell Block Tango
by Blood Rose Knight
Summary: Gender bet hetalia, Waning-Character death. Happy Birthday Sis! Please Review, based on the song from the hit musical Chicago.


Cell Block Tango

Musical: Chicago

Parings: Fem!RomanoXSpain, Fem!EnglandXFrance, Fem!AmericaXRussia, Fem!CanadaXPrussia, Fem!GreeceXJapanXFem!Turky, and Fem!GermanyXItaly

Warning: Genderbent Hetalia, Character Death, Gore, Cussing, and One Shot

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_...And now the Six marry merderesses of the Axis County jail, in there randition of the Cell Block Tango..._

...Pop...

Lovina Vargas was a easily erritated woman. She would always come home and rant on and on to her husband Antonio about how stressful and erritating her work was. She would also try to ignore the annoying habit Antonio had of chewing gum... no not chewing, POPING.

Lovina had just gotton home from work that day. She kicked off her black heals and walked into the kitchen and started rummiging around in the fridge for something to eat. This day at the office had been even more stressful then usual. She had to do most of her co-worker Amila's work cause she was off with Yao the milk man and, Lovina, having the heart she did, just cussed and finished Amilia's work for her. Then she fell behind on her own paperwork and had to smooth talk (Insult the boss) until he agreed not to fire her. So to say Lovina was dangourosly close to the edge was a understatement. She was clinging by her fingernails.

She shivted some of the food in the fridge around till she found what she was looking for. A perfectly ripe tomato. She grabbed the ripe, red fruit form its spot in the back of the fridge. She then started to munch on it as she walked into the living room where Antonio was sitting, being the lazy ass he was.

Antonio was watching football like he always did on Monday's, he had a cold bud light in his hand and was wereing a well stained grey t-shirt and well worn jeans. No to mention chewing his strawberry flavored bubble gum. No Poping his strawberry flavored bubble gum. Dispite the fact he was the laziest human being alive, he was still the hottest man Lovina had ever seen in her life, with a lean and slender build, abs of steel, and a ass that put all other guys to shame.

Antonio's light green eyes fell on Lovina and he smiled. "Hola sinora~ would you mind grabbing me another serabasa?" He asked holding up the empty beer can in left hand. Lovina smiled leaning over the side of the couch to kiss him on the forehead, while simaltaniously grabbing the empty can.

"Of course mi amore." She said before walking back to the kitchen trying to ignore the poping of the strawberry gum. She through the empty can in the garbage and then opened the fridge and grabbed another ice cold beer.

She then walked back in the living room only to stop dead in her tracks. POP! The sound was so erritating she didn't know she was squising the beer can so hard that it exploded, causing the bitter liquid to go everywhere. "You alright mi amore?" Antonio asked looking at Lovina's very pissed off, beer drenched, face.

"Antonio, if you poped that gum one more time..." Lovina said her voice low to the point of being a growl. Antonio, of course, being as happy go lucky and totaly naieve, though the statment was her trying to turn him on. He poped his gum.

A that moment Lovina snapped. She rushed over to the desk where Antonio kept there shot gun just above it. She already knew it was loaded. It always was so that it was ready incase of an emergancy. Her auburn hair was flying after her as she pulled out the gun and pointed it at Antonio's head.

BANG! BANG!

Antonio's dark blood drenched the sand colored carpet. Bits of his brain and blood also managed to find there way to the television screan, making the scean of the football field look like a bloody mess. Lovina then wipped the little bit of blood and brain tissure that was on her cheak away from her with her index finger. She then smiled. Finally, the sound of poping had stopped. She walked out the front door that was just to the left of where the bloody corpse of Antonio lied. She then walked out the door. Ignoring the cold dead green eyes that belonged to her dead husband.

_... I then fired two warning shots... INTO HIS HEAD!_

... Six...

Alice Kirkland was in love with Francis Bonafoyed. She had ment him in a bar about two years ago and they fell in love instaitly, and before Alice knew it they were living together. He would go to work, he would come home, then she would fix him a drink, and they would have dinner.

That was until she found his weding albums, all six of them. They all showed Fransic with a beautiful woman in white dressed, and Fransic in a black tuxedo. She gripped the scrapt books so tightly the pages almost ripped, and she left little cresent moon indents on the covers. She started to clench her teeth so tight to the point of pain. She always knew Fransic was morman, but this was rediculus.

Alice took a deep breath, she hated cheaters. She then looked at the digital alarm clock on the nightstand. It read 6:30. She would have to start dinner. Fransic was going to be home in about ten minutes. Fransic. The name she used to cooe at night was now leaving a bitter tast in her mouth. Alice got to her feet, brushing off her skirt then walking down stairs.

Dinner most nights for them was just a microwave pizza since Alice could barely cook anything edible. she brushed a stray lock of her perfect blond hair out of her emerald colored eyes. She threw a peparoni pizza in the microwave and set the timer. Then the door opened.

Fransic walked it the room, his long blond hair swept back in a ponytail, and crystal blue eyes scanning the room for his love, then he found her.

"Hello my love," he said his voice thick with a french acsent. Alice just put on a smile. She would yell at him later. He walked forward throwing his jacket over the couch then kissing her deeply. His stubble tickled Alice's chin. He then let her go so she could make him his drink.

Alice walked threw the kitchen to get to the bar. She made a jack on the rocks but then something causght her eyes, something extra to add to the drink.

Then She walked back into the living room handing Fransic his drink. He only had to take one drink and then he was coughing up blood. And then, Fransic was dead.

"You should have been faithful." She said before stepping over his corps and walking outside into the rain.

_... You know some guys just can't hold there ARSNIC!_

...Squish...

Amilia Jones was thrilled with her life. She had a awsome job, loving husband, and hot lover. What more could a girl aske for? Amilia was in the kitchen cooking chicken. Well tecnicaly she was cutting chicken to then deep fry and have kentucky fried chicken with her husbend Ivan. She was humming a random song while chopping the white meat off of the bones.

That was until Ivan slammed the door opened. The door hit the tan colored walls with such force that the window shattered. Ivan just ignored it though. His violet colored eyes glared full on rage filled into Amilia's cerile blue ones. "I-Ivan what's wrong." she asked taking a step back causiously. She ws gripping the so tight her knuckles turned white over the bone.

"You've been screwing the milk man!" Ivan screamed is voice full of rage. He had lost it. He had gone insain. He took a step closer, and Amilia took another step back. Her blond locks were quivering as a result of her shaking in fear. He knew and Ivan was known for being a jelous man.

"I don't know what your talking about." Amilia said her voice betraying her.

"Dont' lie, I know you've been seeing Yao Amilia." He was now beyond furrious and Amila was starting to panic. Amilia didn't answer.

"YOU'VE BEEN SCREWING THE MILK MAN!" Ivan then took one step too close. Amila charged knife held high ready to strick.

one.

two.

three.

four. The blood splattered all over amilia drenching her jeans and football tee red. Her hair was dripping with the red liquid and a smile spread across her face as she stabbed at him.

When she was finally finished the kitchen was compleatly covered in blood. Amilia was no exeption to that. She examined Ivan's dead body and started to count the wound she left in his body. The count came to a total of ten. She smiled licking a drop of blood that was near the corner of her mouth. She then walked arond Ivan's body, causeing the blood to splash like it was just a puddle of rain water. She needed a good bang, and was hopping Yao was avalable.

_... And then he ran into my knife, he ran into my knife 10 TIMES!_

... Uh- hu...

Madiline wasn't at fault. She was on the floor crying now because of it. She had just gone out with her friend Margarita and now she was staring at her husband's decapitated form. His stong and well built body laying on the bed where he had taken a nap. His head was on the ground infront of her. She had loved Gilbert. She didn't cut his head off.

No it's was that jelous bastard Anubis. She had been avoiding the star and ignoring his threats that he would take everything she loved if he couldn't have her. But he did. She was crying in her hands, then she desided to say her final good bye. She picked up the head and placed a kiss of the forehead before closing the eyelids to his crimson orbs. That was when the police came, cuffing her. But they couldn't understand her french when she was trying to tell them that she had just gotton there and that she didn't do it. They couldn't understand, and they wouldn't believe her if they could.

_... Uh-hu not guilty!_

_..._Ciecoro...

Aphrodite was happy. She was famous the way she had always wanted to be. She also had a husbend who she loved along with a sister that did whatever she said.

They were in a hotel in ciecoro when it happened. They were drinking some beer and joking around. Aphrodite was happy to be winding down before her big show with her sister, Jasmine, in Chicago. Aprodite was sitting in Kiku's lap and laughing at a stupid joke then she got up to get another beer only to find out they were out of ice.

She held the bucket upside down and only a few drops of water trickled out. "Well looks out your out of ice." She said then the walked to the door and left but not before blowing Kiku a kiss.

She shut the door behind her. walking down the hallway until she finally found the ice room and filled up the bucket of ice. She then walked back to the room, her chocolate colored hair swaying behind her. She then finally reached her room, opened the door, and found her Jasmine and Kiku doing number seventeen the spred eagel.

At that moment she lost it and stalked froward to them and started slamming there heads in. She ignored the screams and blood gussing all over her hands. She couldn't form a single coherent though durring this whole process.

When she finally desided that she had enough. She got up off the bed and walked into that bathroom. She started to wash her hands of the sticky, red liquid. It turned the water bright red. Then it hit her. Her slut of a sister and her cheating husband were dead.

Then She grabbed her coat and walked out the door. She was going to have alot of damage control to do at the show.

_...I was in such a state of shock and can't remember a think, it wasn't until later when I was washing the blood off my hands I never even knew they were dead. _

...Lipshitz...

Anne Belgmit loved Felicano more then she could posibly say. She loved how he would always call her 'bella' and would hide in her arms durring a thunder storm. She especially loved all of his art works. Specially his paintings. Sometimes he would have her pose for paintings. And sometimes he would hire models.

Like Bella, Mae, Natalia, Katasha, and Elizabeta. Anne was always a terrably jelouse girl. Let's just say when she caught Feli with one of those tramps she was quick to throw them out. But after the fith, let's just say she snapped. She brushed a flew locks of her short blond hair back then grabbed his clay cutter. She walked up behind Feli. She then put the clay cutter around his neck and pulled.

The blood was quick but breaf. She had learned her lesson the hard way. Artists just wern't her type.

_...I guess you could say we broke up because of artistic diffrences. He saw himself as alive, and I saw him dead!_

* * *

BRK: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIA HERMANA!

Embra: aww thanks sis love you

BRK: Love you too

Embra: She owns nothing

BRK: and now for the credits

In POP- Lovina = to Lovio/Romano, And Antonio/Spain

In Six- Alice=Aruther/England, and Fransic/France

In squish- Amilia=Alfred/America, and Ivan/Russia

In Uh-hu- Madiline=Mathew/Canada, and Gilber/Prussia

In Cicero- Aprodite=Hercules/Greece, Jasmine=Saduiq/Turky, and Kiku/Japan

and finally in Lipshitz- Anne=Ludwig/Germany, and Felicano/Italy

Please Review


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